I may be feeling just a bit overwhelmed. Between a crawling baby who’s into everything, a home business, having time to devote to this here blog, keeping the house liveable, Spouse fed and trying to have some semblance of a social life I’m feeling run off my feet. Then there’s the old sleep deprivation issue. Two nights of decent sleep and then kerblamo!Back to square one. Controlled Crying failure. Well it’s actually less failure and just more because I’m confused. When she wakes after say 4.30am, she’s hungry right? Because she feeds really well then. Or do you do the re-settling then too? Seriously, I have NFI. Does anyone? Waiting on sleep school, not so patiently.
Last night I truly thought I was going to have a nervous breakdown. This is why. Bogans upstairs returned from holiday to Bali. Celebrate return by loud and sustained special cuddles and chain smoking. Parents downstairs have last day of school holidays breakdown and spend 3 hours screaming at 2 kids. Kids respond by screaming at top of lungs. Sewing machine keeps jamming up during bunting sewing, forcing me to abandon my purple and black experimental bunting, not before considering throwing sewing machine out window. Spouse was working late so I sit down to eat tortellini alone, only to locate a missing pin, which is now firmly stuck in my left thigh. This results in tortellini going skyward and then floor-ward. Pull pin out and sit on couch, crying, remembering when I used to spend my days wandering around Los Angeles, eating Sprinkles cupcakes and doing extremely cheap grocery shopping.
Stop the world, I’m getting off for a while. I have decided all non urgent matters must go on hold. I am also refusing to drive anywhere further than 20 minutes or participate in activities that cause me to either wake Addison up or keep Addison up. You might call it selfish, I call it saving my sanity. I mean, real friends meet you halfway right?
I might be slightly depressed. Squished up apartment living, far too much focus on perfection, minimal sleep and friends who take but never give back are causing me brain strain. Least I’m sticking to my WW points.
Considering moving to Siberia, swapping clothes for Mu-Mu and shunning all human contact.
Apart from Spouse and Smushy, they’re keepers.
PS I know this is all a first world problem whinge, that I am actually very blessed and many others are worse off but sometimes I must get feelings off chest.