{Yes, and No}

 

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I woke up this morning to my 2 year old rubbing the insides of an Anticol up and down my arm. You know the weirdly spicy stuff they put in them? Yep that. Spouse had left them by his bed and Phoenix had procured them, bitten each one open and then made some sort of spicy eucalyptus soup to paint with. You would think that after 3 kids I would wake up early effortlessly and start my day. This is not the case. No, instead I wake up every morning like Rick Grimes emerging from his coma; dazed and confused. (Also, exceptionally thirsty.) I wish I was a morning person. I really do. But Hendrix wakes multiple times to feed and the other two like to wake up to discuss why toothpaste belongs in the bathroom only and request scrambled eggs at 4am. I’m pretty tired hey? Hence why I wasn’t surprised that I hadn’t been woken sooner by Phoenix and his eucalyptus soup palaver.

Anyway I have to drag myself out of bed as Phoenix goes to kindy one day a week on a Monday and Spouse drops him. If I get him dressed quickly he’s out the door before he can wake the baby up with his exceptionally loud voice. We succeed with shoes on but there is jacket refusal and he decides to lie on the kitchen floor in some sort of weird starfish fetal position mix yelling about jackets. Freeze then kid, its cool. Baby wakes up. Addison is demanding she has weetbix with rice milk. The day has begun people.

Today was different though. Today I enrolled Addison in school for next year. School. Proper school. Big school. Down we trotted to the school, forms in hand, her excited, me puzzled. Puzzled as to how this came around so quickly, how she grew so quickly, how I am to flip the coin and become the parent; no longer the teacher. I am not sad about this new stage of our journey, maybe just a little shell shocked. The truth is, ever since Hendrix was born last year I have been in transition. Pregnancy is over for me, I am done with growing and birthing babies. The newborn stage is over and with each month that passes, a new piece of my littlest love emerges. Our toddler, Phoenix, is fiercely independent and gets amongst it. That kid loves life man. And Addison; our lively, funny and kind daughter, is about to enter into a very different stage of her life; one that will take her further out into the world than she’s ever been. Is she ready? Absolutely. She is desperate to step beyond the world she knows. Am I? Yes and no. I’m not really sure how to elaborate on that for you. It’s just…yes and no.

Our family is complete and the next stage awaits. What that looks like, remains to be seen.

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PS It’s been a while; but I’m back and here to stay.

 

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